Unlikely places

Last night I stayed up till 1:15 am playing Webkinz.

It's not my fault. Do you remember that story about the kid who saves and saves and saves his wittle pennies to buy a bike and just can't possibly earn enough, so his dad steps in and pays the rest? Of course you remember that story. We all remember it and it haunts our parental actions. I'm always torn between the beauty of assisting my hard working child "after all they could do" and encouraging them to bask in the satisfaction of achieving their goals. Confound those mormon folktales! They are contributing to my inner war.

So, my eldest three offspring were given Webkinz as a Christmas gift. Since then they have reveled in the virtual cuteness that IS Webkinz. Dressing, feeding, and playing fingernails-on-the-chalkboard animated music videos about a dog called Mustache Louie.

You can see why I've limited their daily computer time to 20 minutes a piece. Sanity must preserved. The time crunch severely limits their ability to earn "kinzcash" by playing games and answering trivia questions. This in turn makes the kinzcash they do earn highly precious and not to be spent willy nilly.

Mathew has been feverishly saving for a backyard for Hooves, his brown Arabian. It's got a pricetag of 1000 smackeroos, so in my effort to jump on the folktale bandwagon, I promised him I'd earn 500 if he'd earn 500 (half a bike is nothing compared to half a backyard).

That brings us to me playing on a child's virtual website in the wee hours of the morning. It didn't take me long to figure out that only a fool would waste time playing Cash Cow 2 or Candy Bash 2 Viva Poncho! when the real money is in Quizzy's Corner. Here you can pretend to be 5 years old and answer questions about shapes and colors and RAKE IT IN! suckahs!

Unfortunately I am the proud owner of an overactive conscience and selected the hardest setting (I think that makes me 13) and selected the "green thumb" category. How could I not?

Imagine my surprise when I received a bit of an early morning education in entomology and horticulture! Did you know that:

**When a spider takes down its web, it means there is a storm coming? Not me!

**Strawberries are a member of the rose family?

**Flies have no ears? Well then what's the point of "shoo, fly, don't bother me"? They can't hear a thing you are saying.

**Male mosquitoes are vegetarian? The ones drinking the blood are the girls. Women can be so mean....when are we going to learn to support one another?

And finally.

**Eggplants are poisonous if eaten raw. POISONOUS? They need to have a sign in the produce section with a little skull and cross bones. What if I had gotten a little creative and tossed a little fresh eggplant in my last pot luck salad? I could've wiped out the entire Relief Society!

I, for one, am highly impressed with the quality education to be had on the internet. Things are going to change around here. All I need to do is balance Webkinz time with a renewed commitment to serve Ramen Noodles and cold cereal on a regular basis.

Because when you know better you do better.