Allow me

I know you are anxiously awaiting a June/July travelogue...but first...

Allow me to recap my day for you.

You'll feel better about yours......I promise.

I fully intended to get up at 6:15 in order to take the dogs for a walk. You might assume that I do this in order to stay in shape. You would be wrong. The vet told me that Tootsie is super fat. It's true. So now I get up to try to slim down the dog. I guess if you can't do it for yourself, do it for the dog. Unfortunately I was unable to gather the strength to get out of the house before the kids woke up at 6:23. So one by one, each puffy-eyed, bed-headed little person requested in that gravelly voice if he/she might accompany me on my walk. Mark hates to pass up a family outing, so soon we left the house with one Basset mut with a broken leash, one obese weiner dog, one boy on a bike, another on foot and two girls in pajamas in a double stroller. At least Tootsie didn't poop in someone's driveway today.

I had packed the library books up last night, thinking we would go pick out new ones around 9 am. Instead we stayed home and watched unhealthy amounts of television and consumed dangerous quantities of otter pops. We did take a few breaks for fighting and sitting in time out.

I planned to make "drip beef sandwiches" for dinner. So I put a roast in the crock pot and assembled the spices in a tea ball. It's a process, but worth it. Mark came home for lunch and let me know he wouldn't be home for dinner...which left ONE person who likes drip beef sandwiches. Yeah.

Well...they make great leftovers and I figured we could just take advantage of the half price kids meals at Dairy Queen. So I go about the afternoon.

I take a peek outside and puruse the garden. I realize that there are alot of tomatoes that need picking and the onions are ready to come out as well. Soon I've got a countertop full of produce and I get a hankering for fresh salsa. I get out the food processor and plug it in. Too bad I unknowinly unplugged the crockpot. About for hours later I check on the roast and I wonder aloud "What the heck?" and then "Crap!". Nothing like a cold lump of half cooked cow to really work up the appetite. This day is rockin.

So I suppose we'll just head to the library and then swing through the drive thru at Dairy Queen. It's 4:30 when we get to the library. We get in and we get out. Requests to play "Magic School Bus" on the library computers are preemptively denied. We take a quick detour to Hobby Lobby to get some material for my calling (Let's hear it for Nursery!). We are sure to break a Christmas ornament on the way out. I was less that charitable, I'll admit. Instead of "that's okay, sweetie, let's go tell the lady and we'll make it right" I hissed, "Didn't I tell you not...to...touch!"

Ah...those precious moments I get to revisit when they're sleeping peacefully in their beds and I suddenly feel like the slime of the earth. Awesome.

So then we're on our way, but the trip wouldn't be complete before I lose it on Megan in the parking lot because she refuses to clip into her carseat.

We drive the 15 ish miles from Hobby Lobby to the Dairy Queen not far from our home. I pull up to the big menu thingy and I order 4 kids meals. I'm trying to "be good" and resist getting something for myself. I finish ordering and expect to hear something in the ballpark of "That'll be 7.50" and instead it's almost 14.00. I think, "huh". So I pull up and realize I'm at Sonic. Dairy Queen is one fast food joint to the south.

Seriously?

So by now I am....shall we say...irritated? I've decided I'm getting myself a Big Mac. I DESERVE IT. (You know I do). As I drive down the hill to the McDonalds, I look through the kid's meals and realize that instead of a banana, they gave me apple slices. So I get in the Mcdonalds drive thru line...I'm taking mental inventory of my fridge and seeing if I can come up with something in there that sounds better than the burger that I will most assuredly be burping all night. After 45 seconds in that line I pull out and drive up the hill. Back to Sonic and get the stupid banana. He tells me to keep the apples and I think to myself, "uh... yeah I am!"

We get home.

The kids eat and I don't have the oomph to cut the watermelon that had mentally persuaded me to pass on the Big Mac.

Kids are fighting.

I call it.

Bed time.

Megan only comes out to "tell me something" seven times.

They are finally asleep and I feed the dogs and do the dishes.

My house smells like beef and I'm hungry.

Feel better about your day?